To Thy Known Self Be True

by Gary Loper on October 20, 2014


This blog was originally posted 2010, currently updated.

I have spent a lot of energy over the past 25 yrs entrenched in personal development, with so many great coaches and mentors, sharing what has worked for them and how it would impact my life to emulate their patterns.

I have taken it all in and have been overwhelmed at times, hearing something delivered with so much power that I was ready to cut my hair, shave and purchase a sport coat, thinking that was the missing piece. I was lead to believe by some, that people are threatened by appearances that are different then their own. The message was to conform.

Then two days after watching a video of a well known speaker driving the message of a suit and tie, I received another video, the other side of the coin you might say.

To thine own self be trueIn this video, I saw a guy, who looked like me—after a day at the beach, promoting a high price package sitting behind a table with the box of stuff in front of him, many times covering his mouth with his hands or the product. The over casual approach and body language raised my buttons and I turned it off without ever seeing the entire clip.

This alarmed me that I was put off by someone who looked closer to me than the suit and tie guy. Was I secretly afraid of his look and did not want to trust him? Did I need to move closer to the “other side” to gain acceptance? More confusion arose when I learned that the long hair guy, reportedly sold millions of dollars of product in just a couple of days with this clip.

You can never say the wrong thing to the right person or the right thing to the wrong person.

What I learned was to thy known self be true. Trying to fit in to another view of what is easier from them to handle, will lead to inner turmoil, always chasing for someone’s approval.

No manner what we are promoting, the real product is you. People will be drawn to you and your personality and values. There are a huge number of things people are looking for in any relationship—personal, or business—there is more than enough for all without trying to clone one another as the only way. Systems and duplication are important but need to be tweaked depending on the audience.

What has worked for you? I am interested in learning from your experiences in being true to yourself and creating a public image that people are drawn to.


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Build attraction.  Focus on relationship building and delivering real value. To tweet, your tweets should contain one or more of these four elements: Entertain, Educate, Enhance, and Engage.

Entertainment is subjective. If your tweets need to be explained like jokes than the message will be lost. Think bigger audience. Share videos, like music, comedy from professionals, emotional stories that will touch people’s hearts, messages that will make us think. Children and pets are huge hits, if they are in alignment with your Twitter strategy.

Shift the Focus to Serving Others UpdatedEducate people. Shift the focus to serving others, tweets that educate people in areas that will improve their lives. That doesn’t necessarily mean you send them an article about how great your service or product is.  This is not a selling opportunity, but rather an education to help individuals with something else. It can be a third party blog or article that validates what you are doing. There will be plenty of opportunities to share your products and services after you have established trust and rapport with your Twitter community.

Enhance their lives. Share tweets that enhance their lives that has absolutely nothing to do with buying something from you. Tweet something that is impactful, and makes a positive change in someone’s life. Motivational and inspirational quotes are one of the most frequently ‘Retweeted’ tweets because so many people are looking for inspiration. One of my favorite quotes from Zig Ziglar: “People often say that motivation doesn't last. Well, neither does bathing, that's why we recommend it daily”.

Engage with peopleEngage with people. To create engagement first you have to engage with other people. Comment on their posts and answer their questions, and then when you start building a rapport you will earn the right to ask people your own questions. People are watching you and how you are responding, so give first. In any relationship we end up receiving more when we give first than sitting back and waiting for somebody else to come and give to us first.

Having those elements will be a strong magnet that will turn on the follower magnet and allow people to come to you.  Embrace the 4E’s and people will be attracted to you, and want to follow your account.

Furthermore, you can automate some of your messages to create a presence.  When I automated some of my client’s tweets, 20 messages a day, it saved them about 20 – 30 hours a month from having to post those messages. They were able to take that time back, and focus on engagement and develop connections. And from that they were able to create and attract new clients.  There can be a workable balance between automation and live tweeting, making it very effective for people to grow their business.

4 Es updatedWhen tweeting, remember the 4E’s. People that broadcast only about their specials, and what they are doing is ineffective. It’s all about people to people. People want to connect with the person. It is not the Yellow Pages’ ad or the Sunday newspaper. We all are bombarded with so much information and so many offers that is important to take the time and apply those 4E’s.  Look to construct your tweets the way that the reader is going to see them.

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