Aha Moments That Changed My Life, Part 2

by Gary Loper on July 18, 2014

 

Back in 1996 when I first moved to Florida, at some point in my journey a light bulb went off, it was an ‘aha’ moment.  I was walking the beach, reflecting on everything that transpired in my life and I was wondering why my family wasn’t reaching out to me. I realized I was living my life for the approval of my family who were not reaching out to me or even talking to me. I considered and entertained the thought … Was it just because I moved?  Looking at my past I realized that they were not reaching out to me when I was living in Wisconsin, and I was even geographically closer to them. They truly weren’t doing anything out of their normal, but I was expecting love and validation, and clearly wanted people to come and connect with me.

Taking it a step further, I realized I never felt the type of love I wanted to receive from my parents. I am sure that they loved me in their own way. Nevertheless, probably until I was 47 years old I never realized that they were only capable of loving me in the way they knew how. So, when I was able to recognize what people’s limitations were, what they had already done, and if I had a different expectation then what they were delivering that was my fault. I was reacting with disappointment, depression, anger because loving connections were not made … I wasn’t feeling loved; but, I was expecting something from them then what they were able to do for themselves or anybody else.

Don't Take Anything PersonallyI began to recognize the whole pattern, ‘Don’t Take It Personally’, one of the ‘Four Agreements’ authored by Don Miguel Ruiz. Sitting back and observing the circumstances, even though I was affected by this, I was able to learn that it wasn’t me and accept their behaviors, and what they are capable of and willing to be able to do.

When we are able to get to that place and look objectively at every single situation that comes to us, and be able say … What does this mean to me? How can I use this?  … We are in a place of understanding and acceptance. Now I use that lack of recognition and validation from my parents and my family to be able to realize what that feels like, and understand what other people are going through.

I have learned to be to take all my situations since then and turn them into something positive. Paraphrasing Napoleon Hill – “There is a seed of good within every bad thing that happens to you”. I am always looking for the seed.

Without that emotional abandonment or rejection I felt from my family, I wouldn’t have been as passionate about wanting to create good relationships, to be able to reach out and make sure that I was a better husband for my wife, and to extend myself to my community and to be able to serve. That was my ‘aha’ moment to learn how to shift those things that happened, and not dwell in the ‘poo’ and start looking for the ‘pony’ in all of it. And, have happy rides!

Do you need help to sieve through the 'poo' to find the seeds?
Sign up now — Receive private coaching at group coaching rates.

You may be interested in reading my other blog, 'Road to Self-Discovery'.

If you missed, 'Aha Moments That Changed My Life, Part 1', click here.

 

{ 1 comment }

View My Storify: #GLTP on #YoungEntrepreneurs

by Gary Loper on July 17, 2014

 

liefire-storify-hed-2013For those of you who have never used or followed Storify, basically it is a social network service that creates content taken from timelines using such social media sites as Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram.

If you missed my last #GLTP on Thursday, July 17th, here’s the opportunity to be a part of the Twitter Party Topic – #YoungEntrepreneurs.

Be sure to be a participant, RT those messages you resonate with – that offer value, and add comments to initiate conversations. Also, this will give you an opportunity to connect with new Tweople, create possible future partnerships and expand your Twitterverse – develop other meaningful and mutually beneficial relationships.

Remember look for the new shorter hashtag #GLTP in either Twubs or Tweetchat. The next Twitter Party will be on Saturday, August 2nd, starting Noon ET, Topic: #Enthusiasm.

Keep the Party Going, Happy Tweeting! See Storify Below –

{ 0 comments }

View My Storify: #GLTP on #Kindness

July 16, 2014

  For those of you who have never used or followed Storify, basically it is a social network service that creates content taken from timelines using such social media sites as Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram. If you missed my last #GLTP on Wednesday, July 16th, here’s the opportunity to be a part of the Twitter […]

Read the full article →

Aha Moments That Changed My Life, Part 1

July 14, 2014

  Life’s daily events shift from day to day, changes evolve and challenges occur, all serving a higher purpose.  Being open and learning the lessons in every situation is necessary for growth, ultimately to make it better going forward. My methodology has been to practice personal growth each and every day. I have learned from […]

Read the full article →

#YoungEntrepreneurs on #GLTP Chat – July 17th, Thursday, 5 – 7 pm ET

July 12, 2014

  Up until June 1, 2014 you could find Gary’s Twitter Party at #GaryLoperTwitterParty. To make room for additional characters in your tweets, we will now be using the short tag #GLTP. SOME GENERAL INFORMATION: Connect on Twubs or TweetChat. Are you wondering what a Twitter Party is?  Watch this video. To help you with […]

Read the full article →

#Kindness on #GLTP Chat – July 16th, Wednesday, 5 – 8 pm ET

July 5, 2014

  Up until June 1, 2014 you could find Gary’s Twitter Party at #GaryLoperTwitterParty. To make room for additional characters in your tweets, we will now be using the short tag #GLTP. SOME GENERAL INFORMATION: Connect on Twubs or TweetChat. Are you wondering what a Twitter Party is?  Watch this video. To help you with […]

Read the full article →

View My Storify: #GLTP on #BizFreedom

July 5, 2014

  For those of you who have never used or followed Storify, basically it is a social network service that creates content taken from timelines using such social media sites as Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram. If you missed my last #GLTP on Saturday, July 5th, here’s the opportunity to be a part of the Twitter […]

Read the full article →

#BizFreedom on #GLTP Chat – July 5th, Saturday, 12 – 3 pm ET

June 27, 2014

Up until June 1, 2014 you could find Gary’s Twitter Party at #GaryLoperTwitterParty. To make room for additional characters in your tweets, we will now be using the short tag #GLTP. SOME GENERAL INFORMATION: Connect on Twubs or TweetChat. Are you wondering what a Twitter Party is?  Watch this video. To help you with being […]

Read the full article →

View My Storify: #GLTP on #MGAware

June 25, 2014

  For those of you who have never used or followed Storify, basically it is a social network service that creates content taken from timelines using such social media sites as Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram. If you missed my last #GLTP on Wednesday, June 25th, here’s the opportunity to be a part of the Twitter […]

Read the full article →